There is no question that music plays a large part in our lives. From hearing the beat of our mother's heart within the womb, hammering on a toy drum as we explore childhood to listening to songs that remind us of our youth and days gone by. Music is our soundtrack to our lives. We all have our own Mixtape.
Music accompanies us as we journey through life, the good and the bad times. It is our constant companion.
So how can music help support us during grief and loss? The world of science has done many studies into how music effects us and about the chemicals that are released within our bodies that simply put, makes us feel good. We all have a list of songs that we go to to remember good times and lift our spirits. We also have those songs that support us in more difficult times, that express how we are feeling deep within ourselves when we have difficulty finding the words to describe it. I feel that sad songs play just as an important role as the happy, lighter tunes. They allow us to feel the pain fully. To get to know that emotion and feel it fully within ourselves and to express it.
Yesterday as was driving in my car, a place where I tend to let my mind wander with no direction. I noticed that a few songs that played from my recently downloaded albums featured Forgiveness. My mind settled on this and explored. Reminding me of my own personal journey of Forgiveness. This I will share with you today.
Today I've been drawn to talk about creating change. By this I really mean positive change. We find ourselves in grief due to change, this is clear and will be from a life changing and altering event. But one of the points that has arised time and again for me since my loss has been, "Am I my circumstances?" "Am I this loss? A widow, a single parent, a mother and no longer a wife?" We are very quick to label ourselves in a way that can help us build a protective story around us. I definitely experienced this last year when I was desperately searching for a new family home after our landlord sold the house we were living in. I laid down the widow card straight away with every estate agent I came into contact with. It was my buffer and comfort blanket, I had this as a way of explaining why I was alone with three children and hadn't worked for a while. Justifying my situation. Which as I look back now is very strange for me, as a general rule I'm not really that bothered by the opinions of others about me. But this was a complete button pusher due to the pressure of providing a safe home for my children.
I guess where I'm going with this is, as we begin to connect with our hearts and nature we can begin to break down the stories that we use to protect us. We can discover what now lies ahead in the new version of our lives and give gratitude to those stories for the protection that they gave us when we needed them most, when we were vulnerable, scared and in pain. There's no judgement here, we are all exactly where we should be. As a friend once told me, "Everything is perfectly perfect."
This is a journey, the roads are far from straight, some signposts will probably be missing and half the time the map is upside down.
This morning I am up early to get ready for a day out with my children and we are meeting up with my Dad and Step Mum. We are going to be discovering a place on Dartmoor that I have been wanting to visit for a while now, a woodland gorge along the Teign River.
Things have been a little tough going at home lately, in fact they have been very difficult. New challenges are starting to arise around my husbands passing and for me and my family it has been causing a great deal of upset and stress. So I have been guided to begin to share my challenges and the techniques I use to work through them. Grief is not a linear transit and as we walk up and down this path together I think it only fair that I share how the Nature Kingdom and Natural Modalities can support us in this journey.