In my latest Livestream I was guiding to talk about Anger. It’s something that I see pop up time and again on bereavement groups on Facebook, so I thought I’d share some of my essences that can help to support us when Anger raises within us.
In the beginning of my journey with grief, I was lead to believe that it happens in ‘stages’. I quickly found that this was really not the case and as I read more about it and experienced it for myself I learnt that it is in fact more fluid, with ebbs and flows, highs and lows. Every emotion taking its turn or coming in for the attack in groups with force.
Anger is not always part of everyones personal journey and it may come as a complete shock for those that don’t really get anger and frustrated. This can prove to be a very upsetting and unsettling experience. Finding ways in which we can manage this unpredictable emotion can be a wonderful and comfortable resource.
One way to think of anger, as well as all the other emotions, thought patterns and feelings that you go through with grief and loss, is that it is a temporary state rather than a ‘stage’ or ‘phase’. That it is something that will pass through as acknowledge and accept it as just being part of your journey. There is always much me can learn about ourselves and grow from in this process when we can embrace it.
It’s very natural to look to place blame, your hurt or frustration. We like things to be logical and in boxes. It helps the brain and soul to feel as though it’s coping. But at times it’s just not that simple. Anger will not always feel logical or rational, this in itself can be frustrating. However, it has always helped me to remember that Anger is not right or wrong, it just simply is. It’s a natural part of the process, weather it comes up or not, and especially when you least expect it.
There are many things that can trigger feelings of anger, such as:
The lost loved one
Others involved, such as hospital staff, other people at an accident
Family and friends that appear to have moved on
Yourself, especially if you are feeling that you are not coping as well as you should.
Programmes and adverts on TV that show happy ‘complete’ families
Other people going about their daily lives and seem happy and content
The list goes on…
However, if we can take a moment to look at Anger as a positive we can begin to understand its purpose in helping us. It’s a way of helping the body to release the pain being held within it. Grief hurts, thats a fact. Anger allows us to release the energy of pain. Allowing this out in a safe way is a really positive way in which we can manage how we walk our path with grief.
There are many ways in which we can cope with Anger in a safe and constructive way. Physical activities, such as sports or exercise, hobbies and crafting, being creative, music, writing, talking to supportive people. Again here the list goes on.
In the video below I show you four of my essences from my Earth Moon range that can help you work through Anger. Essences work in a gentle way that allows these emotions to be processed from the body. When we bury our anger this can have a more harmful effect on us than if we safely express it.
Please do share your experiences in the comments or on my Facebook page, Nature of Grief, if you feel called to do so. We help each other in our offerings.